Chapter 10

DRINKING FOR 11

I.

Douglas stood up and set his guitar on the stage quickly, jumping off the stage as he crouched to set it down.  He quickly gathered Merideth in his arms and squeezed her tight.  “I can’t believe its you.”
“I’m glad you missed me Douglas Terrian.”  Merideth said and forced herself out of his arms.  “You didn’t tell me you were playing down here, I would have been here to see you.”  She said, putting her hands on her hips.
“I can’t really hear you, hold on.”  Douglas said and turned around.  “Guys, could you take care of my guitar for me?”
“Sure.”  Eric said as he took his bass off stage.
“Thanks man!”  Douglas called back, turning back to Merideth.  “You wanna step to the back so we can talk?”
“That would be absolutely marvelous, handsome sir.”  Merideth said with a chuckle.
“Why so formal, young lady?”  Douglas replied, his smile growing by the minute.  Douglas put his hand around her lower back as he walked her through the crowd.  He wanted to finger her shirt to remember how soft they were before, but he figured that would be out of the question; they were just getting to talk to each other again.  When they reached the back of the club Merideth turned around and hugged him tight around the waist.
“You never wrote back.”  She said with a very sad look on her face.
“When did you write?”  Douglas said shocked that he had missed one of her letters, and a little ashamed of himself.
“I wrote you a few months ago, in like, March.”
“You are kidding me.  I must have been swamped with the band, I’m so sorry.”
“Its fine, I get to see you now, that’s all that matters.”  Merideth said, and rested her head on his chest.  Douglas’s heart fluttered as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders.
“So,” Douglas said with a smirk, “if you weren’t here to see me, who did you come see?”
“Plan B of course.”  Merideth said, looking up at Douglas. “I heard them when I started going to school, and I’ve been going to their shows ever since.  How’d you get mixed up with them?”
“They found me when I was playing a show and wanted me to tour with them.”
“That’s so strange, but I guess whatever works.”  Merideth said with a chuckle.  “How have you liked touring?”
“Its amazing.”  Douglas said, looking into her eyes.  All the memories, all the feelings he had for her came rushing back, almost to the point where it overwhelmed him.  He fought back tears as he held her close again.  “I missed you.”
“I know Douglas, I know.”  She said and held him tighter.  “I missed you too.  I’m sorry we ended like we did.”
“We never ended Merideth.  We never started.  We’re continuing.”  Douglas said and rubbed her back.  Douglas felt something on his chest, and thought Merideth was sobbing.  “It’s okay Merideth, don’t be sad.”  As Douglas pulled away, he could see the biggest grin on her face, and as she looked at his face she started laughing uncontrollably.
“You couldn’t get any cheesier than that!  When’d you start reading Cheesey Lines for Beginners?”
“In my Cheesey Lines 101 class.”  Douglas said as he smiled.  He turned to the stage and saw that Plan B was getting ready to play.  “They’re about to start.”
“Oh.”  Merideth said, almost a little sad.  She then took Douglas’s hand and took him into the crowd.  “Dance with me.”  She said as Plan B started playing.  Merideth grabbed Douglas around the waist and rocked back and forth, watching Plan B the whole time.  Douglas followed along, but his eyes never left her figure.  He watched as the red hair bobbed back and forth in a waltz that could only happen for her, watched as her shoulders rocked like a boat on the sea, and Douglas was at peace.  The last few bagel eating weeks never existed at this moment, it was only Douglas and Merideth, joined at the hip once again.

II.

Douglas was looking out the bus window with a smile on his face.  He got to see his beloved Merideth again, and the tour was over.  He got to go back to his quaint town and wait for whatever was going to happen next.  He was hoping he could go back down to Sacramento soon, and see his best friend again, but he’d have to see how money went.  He couldn’t forget one thing Merideth had said after the show.
After Plan B had finished playing, Douglas asked Merideth to wait for him at the stage, and went and talked to the band.  He told the band that he had met one of his really close friends again, and wanted to say goodbye to her alone before he got back on the bus.  The band understood, and said they’d make the bus driver wait.  The bus driver would have to wait, it had to drop off the rest of the band in the same place anyway.  Douglas thanked them with a smile and went back to Merideth.  He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and led her out of the club.  She leaned on him, which made Douglas feel needed, more needed than he had felt for such a long time.
“Where’s your car?”  Douglas said quietly to her as they walked into the parking lot.
“I came on the bus.”  Merideth said, almost as though she were in a dream.
“Okay, I’ll wait until it gets to the bus stop.”
“Oh, Douglas, you don’t have to.  Won’t the bus leave without you?”
“Doubtful, it’d look bad for the company I think.  How long will it take?”
“Not long at all, it’ll be here in ten minutes.”
“That seems like just enough time to say goodbye to each other.”
“Yes.”  Merideth said again, softer.  “Yes it does.”
They walked in silence to the bus stop on the corner of the street.  They didn’t talk, only enjoyed each other’s company.  Two friends reacquainted, not having to say a word to each other, knowing exactly how each other felt.  They both felt a great sense of longing, like they both needed the others’ arms to keep them alive.  Merideth looked down the street, dreading the time the bus would show up, and Douglas just rested his head on the top of hers, eyes closed.  As the bus turned the corner, Merideth stood up.
“Well, Doug.”  Merideth said, slightly saddened.
“Well?”  Douglas said, quietly.
“I’m not moving, but this is goodbye again.”
“At least I know you’re safe, that’s what matters to me.”
“Well I’m glad.”  Merideth said and smiled as the bus stopped at the corner, brakes squeaking like a bunch of mice being pressed in a vice.  Merideth walked over and kissed Douglas on the cheek, giving him one last hug.  “I did miss you.”
“I missed you more.”
“I know, but you’re wrong.”
“What?”
“The man is always wrong, silly.”  She said and laughed.  Merideth let go of Douglas and started to get on the bus.
“Hey!”  Douglas said quickly.
“Yeah?”  Merideth called, hanging onto the hand rail on the stairs, leaning out of the bus.
“What did that letter say?”
“You’ll have to see when you get back, dear.”  Merideth said with a smile.  “Miss you already.”
Merideth walked back inside the bus and Ernie closed the doors.  Douglas waved as the bus drove away, and muttered to himself, “Me too.”
The bus took off as he got there, to many shouts from Betabet and the bus driver.  He couldn’t help but smile though, nothing could ruin Douglas’s night, not now.  He rubbed his cheek as he sat down, still feeling the soft satin of his beloved’s lips.
The bus drive wore on, and Douglas eventually fell into a deep sleep filled with the worst nightmares.  He was in a dark black, a dark nothing.  He could hear Candice and Eric calling to him in the black, and all Douglas could do was push forward towards the voices.  Eventually he saw Eric and Candice, a strong light glowing from them, and he also saw Merideth, a stronger light coming from her.  He stared at the two lights, and tried to figure out why Merideth wouldn’t just walk to Candice and Eric and be safe in the dark abyss that surrounded all of them.  He eventually saw the dark seep in to the light like smoke, all three figures standing perfectly still and accepted the watery depths consensually.  Douglas felt trapped as he jolted awake in his bus seat, still facing the window.  The sun was rising on the familiar freeway to his house, but Douglas couldn’t help but have his heart sucked into the dream abyss.  For the first time in his life, Douglas felt split, like his heart was fighting a war.  Good verses evil, alpha verses omega, light verses dark, and Douglas could only sit back as the victors decided the war for themselves.

III.

When Douglas arrived at his house, it was 7:00 on Sunday, still very early in the morning for being a weekend.  He unlocked the door, shut it quietly behind him, took his bags inside and crashed on the bed.  He slept until 11:23, and then woke up, feeling 50% better.  He’d only feel 100% after a few days of that, but he had a few days.  He rubbed his eyes, sat up and stretched, and went into the kitchen to see his loving parents.  As he left his room, he smelled the smell of warm pancakes and sausage, and ran to the kitchen.  He gave his mom a hug, and then gave his dad a hug, and sat down at the table.
“It’s not going to serve itself.”  Douglas’s mom said.
“Of course not, but its nice to pretend.”  Douglas said with a grin.
“And how old are you?”  Douglas’s dad said.
“Old enough to know I’m five at heart.”
“Well you can get up off your five year old butt and get your own pancakes.”
“Such hostility, gosh.”  Douglas said chuckling, patting his dad’s back as he grabbed a couple fresh pancakes.  As he shoved his pancakes in his mouth, mouthful by desperate mouthful, his mom stopped cooking and looked at him funny.
“wut.”  Douglas said, mouth full, cheeks puffed and with a wide eyed look.
“It’s like you’ve never had real food.”
“I don’t count bagels as real food anymore, so no.”  Douglas said, shoveling his pancakes into his stomach.
“Well, tell me you ate more than bagels on your trip.”
“For the first few weeks.”  Douglas said in between bites.
“You’re joking, you ate only bagels for a while.”
“Felt like an eternity.”  Douglas said, sitting back and clutching his belly in satisfaction.  “But I’ll remember next time to take more money.  I didn’t know everything was so expensive.”
“Well, you’ve never been away from the house for that long before, it’s a good lesson for you son.”  Douglas’s dad said, as wise as Confucius.
“Other than that Douglas, did you have fun?”  Douglas’s mom said, grilling up some more buttermilk elixir of life.
“I don’t see how I couldn’t, it was amazing fun.  Met a lot of really cool people.”
“Which means he met a lot of really cute girls.”  Douglas’s dad said with a wide grin.
“I won’t deny that, but I met more than just girls on the trip dad.”
“Meet anybody important?”  His mom asked.
“Important to the band, no.  Important to me, yes.”  Douglas said, and his two parents looked at him with a look on their faces that screamed, ‘Oh?’  “Merideth showed up to the Sacramento show.”
“Oh.” His mom said and went to flipping the pancakes.  “Did you ever write her back?”
“Didn’t know about the letter.”
“I put it right on your desk.”
“I need glasses then.”  Douglas said, getting up for more griddle heaven.  “I’ll read it after I get done eating the most delicious pancakes on the face of the whole planet.”
“I’m sure a famous French grill cook is rolling in his grave.”  Douglas’s dad said.
“If you can name two, I’ll roll in my grave.”  Douglas said with a grin and a laugh.
“It’s like saying there are famous taco shack workers.”  His mom said and nudged Douglas with her elbow.
“Oh ha ha, Mom.”  Douglas said, grabbed some pancakes and sausages and sat down at the table again, shoveling his food into his mouth.  After he had finished this round of cowboy cakes, he went to his room and looked on his desk for Merideth’s envelope.  He searched under other envelopes, through other junk mail and then final found the envelope.  He smelled the envelope, and then pulled it away from his nose, giving himself the stink eye, and then opened it up.  It smelled like paper.  Douglas read the letter quickly, and then about halfway through it had to read it slowly and a lot more carefully.

Dearest Douglas,
I’m so sorry it’s been so long since I wrote last.  I feel like I should apologize for so much, but it would take more than just this letter or many others after.  I’m just glad you’re reading this, if you’re reading it.  I wouldn’t blame you for not, it’s been so long since I wrote last.  I need to talk to somebody out of my circle of friends, and I need to talk to somebody I care about and explain myself.  It just so happens that you’re both.
I don’t want to hurt you by saying this, but I’ve had a boyfriend for a while, but I left him recently.  Something just didn’t feel right being with him, and he just didn’t feel right in general.  He was very protective of who I saw, of who I called, of who I wrote.  I kept telling him I was just writing a friend, writing you, but he wouldn’t listen.  “You’re calling another boy aren’t you?  Who are you writing, you’re boyfriend?” he’d say, and on paper they almost look like jokes.  He wasn’t healthy, and it wasn’t healthy being with him.  No Douglas, he didn’t hit me, but he did beat me down.  It’s been a few months since he and I were together and I’ve used that time to gather who I am again.  It took me a while to realize really what was happening to me, and to realize how much I miss you.  It’s been so many years since I’ve seen your face, since I’ve seen your handsome smile, but its still in my mind, still fresh like it were yesterday.  I remember that last night over looking the city, how much we shared with each other, and how much pain I put you through.
Like I said, I’d have to write so many letters to tell you how sorry I am, but can I just write one and tell you that I’m sorry?  I’m sorry I had to leave, I’m sorry that I made you love me and then tore your heart out.  I’m sorry I didn’t write more often, I’m so, so sorry Doug. I hope you can forgive me, like I’ve forgiven myself for just a few of my faults, and put some others behind me.  I’m allowed to have a past, aren’t I?  That’s a joke, Douglas, laugh.
I don’t know why I wrote you now.  You’ve probably forgotten about me, and if you haven’t this has probably brought up some painful feelings deep in the depths of your sweet, sweet heart.  I guess I wrote to tell you that I still cared, that I still loved you ever so much.  I guess I don’t mean as a friend.  Everybody down here seems so fake, so…blasé compared to my sweet Doug all the way up in Colman.  I hope to hear from you soon, even if it’s just you telling me you hate me.  At least you cared enough about an old friend to tell her to go stuff it.  I just hope you remember that I love you, not as much as I did that night, but enough to tell you twice.  It has been a while, you know.

Lovingly yours,
Merry

P.S.  How’s your band?



Douglas finished the letter and thought frantically for a minute, and looked out his window.  A small piece of Merideth’s letter was stuck to the window, and then the words changed to two words:  ‘Do it.’ were tattooed on the paper in Merideth’s handwriting, and Douglas knew what he had to do.  He looked down at the letter in his hand, and saw that the paper was still whole, which freaked him out, but not enough to deter him from completing the task his manager had set for him.  He wrote on the back of the letter four words: ‘I love you too.’  He ran and grabbed an envelope and a stamp, shoved the letter into the new envelope and sealed it.  He ran to his car, drove to the nearest mail box, then went to Candice’s house.
He ran up and knocked on her door, and luckily she answered.  “What’s up?”
“Let’s move in together.”  Douglas said quickly, and Candice replied with a nervous, frightened laugh.
“Wow man, I like you as a friend, and don’t you think that’s kinda quick?”
“No, sorry, I’m kinda frantic right now.”  Douglas said and took a deep breath.  “Get an apartment with Eric and I, assuming we can get Eric in on it.  I want to move the band to Sacramento, better scene down there, and you’ll be closer to Rich.”
“Well…”  Candice said, “I don’t know if Rich wants to see me.”
“You break up with him?”
“No.”
“Did he break up with you?”
“No.”
“You want to see him again?”
“Yeah, what does this have anything to do wi-“
“Move to Sac.”
“Okay.”
“That was surprisingly easy.”
“Yeah, but I’ve wanted to move out of here for a long time.”
“Me too, this is just my excuse, see ya.”  Douglas said and walked off, hand in the air.  Douglas got in his car and drove over to Eric’s place and quickly convinced him to go down to Sacramento.  The conversation consisted of this:
“Wanna get an apartment with a chick?”
“Yeah, who?”
“Candice.”
“Maybe I could see her nude.”
“No touchy, just lookey.”
“Duh.  See ya.”
Douglas shrugged and then went back home and told his parents, a lot calmer than he was the last hour.  They understood, and told him it was the right time, he was almost twenty six forchrissakes, and said they’d take him down this weekend to find a place.  He told them when they found the place that he wanted to get it, so he was going to pack his stuff now, and they agreed.  It was senseless to take two trips down there, so one ultra trip was best.  He went to his room and started to pack up his stuff, at first into piles, and as the week went on into boxes, and Friday night into a U-Haul.  Saturday at seven the family was in the U-Haul, packed comfy cozy, towing Mothra behind them on their way down to Sacramento, so Douglas could start his long journey to the top.

IV.

“And this is the bathroom.”
“It looks…nice.”  Douglas said, peeking into the bathroom of the apartment.  It was a three bedroom place on the ground floor with one large bathroom.  Douglas never understood why people marveled at bathrooms, hence his response.  To Douglas, it was a place to put your foulest body functions and then a place to clean yourself up.  A good looking place it is not supposed to be.
“Any questions?”  The perky apartment manager asked Douglas and his parents.
“Are there any grocery stores close by?”  His mom asked.
“There are quite a few within walking distance, yes.”
“How much is rent?”  Douglas asked.
“$1,250 a month, that includes the apartment paying for gas, sewer and garbage.”  The ditsy blonde replied, as though a machine.
“Not bad…” Douglas’s dad said, looking at the carpet.
“With three people in here it’ll be a good deal.”  Douglas’s mom said, almost muttering to herself.
“Do you need more time to think?”  The manager asked.
“Can we use the phone in your office to call the roomies?”  Douglas asked her.
“Of course, and at that point we could put in the application.”
“Sounds good.”  His mom said as she started for the door.  The rest of the people followed her out the door and then followed the blonde manager to the office to use the phone.  Douglas sat down in front of it and called Eric first.
“Hello?”  Eric answered.
“Why’s it always you that answers?”
“Phones clipped to my belt.  I’m a busy man you know.”
“Sure.”
“You know…all the ladies that call me.” Eric said and Douglas paused for a second, insults flying through his head at miles a minute.
“Like, who, you’re mom?”  Douglas said, right before his response would have been too thought up.
“I’ll give you that one.”  Eric said and chuckled.  “Anyway, what’s up?”
“$1,250 a month, plus Electricity, washer dryer in the apartment.”
“Bitchin, where?”
“By Sac State.”
“Muy bien, sir.”
“Alright, I’ll call Candice, see ya man.”
“Adios, amigo.”  And then Douglas hung up, dialing Candice’s number after he heard the dial tone again.
“Hello?”  A older sounding man answered.
“Is Candice there?”  Douglas asked as he heard some sounds going on in the back, like a small struggle.
“Just. Give. Me. Thephone there.  Hello?”
“Candice?”
“Yeah, it’s me, what’s up?”
“$1,250 a month, with a washer and dryer in the place, and we have to pay for Electricity.”
“A washing machine?  I don’t know how to use one of those…”
“Better learn, does it sound good.”
“Yeah, yeah I guess so.”
“Sweet deal, I’ll get the approval started.”
“Sweet, seeya.”
“Seeya.”  Douglas said and hung up the phone.  “It sounds like everybody is in, lets get the boring stuff over with.”
“Yaaay.”  Douglas’s dad said and leaned his head back in his chair.

V.

A few weeks and an extended stay hotel later, Douglas was moved in and Eric and Candice were on their way.  Douglas got first dibs on rooms since he was the first one there, so he chose the room with the best view.  It didn’t matter that the view was of another apartment building, it still got some sunlight into it.  Douglas looked at the clock and saw that it was around four, so he got his best casual clothes on and left his new apartment, remembering to lock it and memorizing the path he took to get to the parking lot.  Douglas figured the worst thing he could do was forgetting where he lived and try to get into somebody else’s apartment.  How embarrassing.  He got to Mothra, started her up and then drove a few minutes away and stopped in front of a nice looking house, putting the car in park.  He got out and walked up the walkway to knock on the door.  An older gentleman answered the door, and Douglas said hello to this familiar gentleman.  He had seen the man earlier, and happened to know him for many years before moving down to Sacramento.  “You sure this is okay with you?”
“I’ll admit, its kind of weird, but its you Douglas.”
“I’m glad you see it like that, Mr. Sadler.”  Douglas said walked inside the house.  “So how long until she’s home, you think?”
“Maybe ten minutes.  So it won’t be that long.”
“I’m glad I showed up when I did.”  Douglas said and shook the man’s hand.  “Thanks again.”
“Not a problem.”  Tom Sadler said to Douglas as Douglas turned and walked down the hall to a room in the back where he took off his shoes and laid down on the bed in the room.  Ten minutes later Douglas heard the front door open and some murmuring between the gentleman and another person, the second person becoming both amused and desperate, then finally accepting.  Then Douglas heard footsteps and his heart started pounding.  This was a bad idea, he thought to himself.  The door to the room he was in bumped open, and Tom finally said the magic words.
“Okay, you can open your eyes now Meri.”  And the Tom walked down the hallway, a smile on his face.  Douglas smiled too, seeing Merideth’s face again, as her eyes focused, the light very bright in her room.  Then a smile spread quickly on her face as she ran and jumped on top of him, kissing Douglas quite hard on the lips.
“I got your letter.”  She said, holding herself above his chest.
“You mean you got your letter, with my letter on the back?”
“Yeah, that one.”  She said and laughed, kissing him again.  His heart fluttered with every press of her silken lips on his.  She pulled away again, this time flipping her hair so it hung to one side and asked, “How long are you here for this time?”
“How long do you want me to stay?”
“Umm…how about forever?”
“Well, right now forever is six months, but I’m sure I can sign another lease after this one is up.”
“You mean…”
“I live about five minutes away from you now, Meri.”
“Are you trying to get me to dye of happiness?”
“No, but wouldn’t that be the perfect way to die?”
“Only if you were there with me the whole way.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it any other way, my dearest.”
“Say it again.”
“Say what?”
“Say those three little words you’ve always wanted to tell me since that night.”
“Oh, say that.”  Douglas said, and reached a hand out to hold her soft, gorgeous face in his hand and pulled her toward his lips, giving her a soft kiss before saying those three little words.  “I love you.”
“I love you too, Doug, always have.”  She said and kissed him one more time before laying her head on his chest.  “Now I don’t have to leave.”

VI.

Late that night, Douglas drove home, his head never leaving Merideth’s side.  It would be a few more days before the rest of the band moved in, so Douglas was living it up while he could.  He was planning on calling up and getting take out for the third night this week, so he was walking pretty quickly to the door after getting his car into the lot.  He retraced the steps he took earlier that day and finally made it to his doorstep.  He put his key in the lock, opened the door, and then noticed a piece of paper taped to the door.

Douglas,
Stopped by when you
weren’t here, call me
974-5525

Roger

“Who the hell is Roger?”  Douglas said and shut the door.  But Douglas figured he’d call it.  But tomorrow.  Rice Plate down the street was calling him, so he figured he’d call them.